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I write a lot of stuff about life and random things that I experience that I just can't make up.  So if you want to be added to the insanity...comment away
smurphy487: (Default)
Still here.

I am trying to organize twitter, tumblr, facebook, LJ and god knows what else.

Back in NJ.

Long story.

#4: Fear

Aug. 12th, 2009 11:08 pm
smurphy487: (Default)
I am starting to pack up books.

The sight of an empty bookshelf made me cry.

Why am I so scared?
smurphy487: (pic#161739)

I can do a paper on entrapment in 19th Century Victorian novel as it is illustrated in The Piano, bring up female and male entrapment, the piano itself as a character that entraps everyone, and reference the other novels.

You want only 10 pages on this?

Oh, this could be article material?

Okay, maybe the scholar life might not be a bad idea.

I heart Victorian Literature.


Jul. 16th, 2009 11:00 am
smurphy487: (sounded better in my head)

Can Hugh win this fucking time??!!


And this guy should get an Emmy too - or it is a crime

smurphy487: (Default)

I have a lot to think about. The move to Vermont is on but not until next summer or fall (Cass is actually looking out for me and my grad school career). At the same time the offer is on the table to move to Yardley, PA. We spend a lot of time together and though I can still drive to Monmouth (still a drive) I would have to leave Ross and hope for a job in PA which might be possible (teaching jobs -- none in this area of PA) through Cass’s friends.

The rent would be cheap for me -- we are looking at moving in his complex to a 3 bedroom (yes I know that is a lot for us) but one bedroom would be Cass’s office, the other would be the animal room (for the ferrets and Cass wants a dog) and the big one would be for us.

How cheap would the rent contribution have to be for me? About $350 a month plus helping out with other utilities. I would need cable and Cass doesn’t have it here because he doesn’t use it. What am I going to do about shows that I watch -- I have to make the campaign that I need to have some channels. In the bedroom the second TV (or my current TV would be) and that is what needs to get the cable.

The thing is if it was Vermont I would be all ready to go, but for this it is going to be more of a struggle to move and then move again.

I like my place in Westfield. Granted I am closer to everything here more than Westfield, but it’s not Westfield. I have been here for almost six years and that is home to me next to my parents’ home.

I know I have to let go and move on and grow up and learn that there are others in life, but it is so bad for me to feel selfish? I never was a clingy person and I like being able to go where I want and do what I want without having to answer to anyone for SIX years (those who know me remember the strangle hold Dad had on me).

I want the domestic life (and Cass can see it in me) but it is going to make me OCD on crack. I straighten things up all the time and it is probably a form of control that I am holding onto.

I am going to head to the folks on Wednesday if the truck is fixed to be able to talk to Mom about this. I am sure she will be behind me, but I don’t want to bring this up with her on the phone.

The move would not happen until the end of September.

Oh yeah and add that Sunny will be about a half hour from me. So much good but school and work are factors. I don’t want to be the housewife in training.


I am pissed at the world of Fed Ex. Trying to get them to deliver the DMB tickets is hell. First time they tried to deliver to Cass’s place (um, no). I realized why and that would be from the time I had to send Cass’s phone back to Verizon so I guess instead of the fucking address The Warehouse gave them they were going to try with that one. WTF?!

It gets worse. Today I get up at 5:45 to drive Cass to the train and then head to NJ for a doctor’s appointment (I’ll get to that later) and then to wait for the tickets since I talked to Fed Ex and they changed the addy. Well I check the status at 11:30 and I get the message that customer was not home/business was closed - signature required. I call Fed Ex AGAIN. They have the right addy and have no idea why there would be that problem. Well I have until 2pm since I have to drive back to PA to get Cass at the train and then drive BACK to NJ.

But Fed Ex got Cass his replacement phone with no fucking problem.


Because of certain things going on biologically, I am now being monitored for my thyroid. Mom had a cancer scare when I was seven so now the doctor wants to monitor it.

Mind you, my insurance runs out July 31.

Don’t even start me with trying to find an individual plan. If I go to PA I am royally fucked unless I can have NJ insurance in PA. Problem - trying to find mental heath coverage.


And still no truck yet.
smurphy487: (Default)
Night two of tech and I had a meltdown.

This play is going to destroy me


May. 4th, 2009 12:11 am
smurphy487: (Default)
I has journal.

I might make this one a writing one.



Apr. 19th, 2009 11:07 am
smurphy487: (Default)
Daily Brain Farts

  • 17:23 beautiful day here in PA #
  • 23:47 playing atlantica while sweetie naps #
  • 23:50 dinner with sweetie's dad pics had to be taken #
  • 00:18 i am going to head to sleep...the ps3 is giving problems and sweetie is tired #
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Apr. 17th, 2009 11:00 pm
smurphy487: (Default)
Daily Brain Farts

  • 06:57 i has an awesome boyfriend #
  • 09:08 okay theater stuff really pissing me off...I am the director, not the cleaning person #
  • 10:52 need to work on the paper #
  • 13:19 i feel like I am going to puke #
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smurphy487: (prescription drugs)
Post it.

Pass it on.

smurphy487: (Obama NJ)
This man is my president

I never thought I would see this in my lifetime.


I can't stop crying.

For my non-American friends, I would love to hear how the reaction has been where you live.


smurphy487: (Default)

August 2012

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